Learning Constellations – Alemka’s approach

What I offer through my programs

is the experience of the systemic principles as discovered and described by Bert Hellinger, mostly through phenomenological method, which he is also an originator of and which I have learned from him. This means that I invite those who want to learn from me to open themselves to the universal forces which operate in the field we are all part of, and to learn from their own experience of these forces at work.

Through the Wu Wei principle* of doing-without-doing (you can read more about this principle below), we practice the discipline of surrendering of our ego, will and reason, and we open ourselves up to the teachings of our own soul. In this way we look at particular situations affecting us and explore how they are linked with universal systemic principles. We learn how we can align ourselves with these forces better and look at where maybe we are not in harmony with them in our lives.

Once we learn how to bring ourselves to be „in tune“, we can also assist others to do the same, if we are in a position to do so. Always with the respect of higher forces, natural laws and in harmony with the Spirit. Always in full acknowledgement of our personal limitations and limitations of our fate, and in full agreement of such limitations. Always honouring that which is and which binds us to our fate, even our limitations, as the best possible, perfect circumstances for our life.

We will also learn how to accept our life through our parents in a way which allows us to make the most out of it: the most of health, the most of joy, the most of success and the most of love. As we learn the ways how to surrender our small ego and align ourselves with the greater forces working through us in our lives, we also learn ways how to be of service to others. And, at the same time, we grow in our understanding of the universal principles of life.

Through the path of your own  (in)personal growth, you will learn about the universal consciousness and you will, by learning about it, also contribute to its development. While looking at your personal issues through the method of constellations, you will come to understand how systemic principles work on collective levels, and in which way the individual and the collective relate to each other.  You will learn how the collective systemic principles which are at work in wars affect you, and what you can do so as not to feed the vicious circle of conflict and violence.

So, we will learn about the Field, about the forces which operate in it and also how to navigate the field. This will be done through a series of modules which will focus on different aspects, or different expression of these forces, for example; how do they show themselves in our partners relationships, relationships with our parents and children, how do they work in us in situations of personal or collective trauma, what role do they play in our health and illness, how do they contribute to our business success or failure and other.  We will see how specific life situations are affected by these forces and also what we can do to have a good life, to find good solutions for our life difficulties. We will learn about the methods and procedures through which we can do that, not as a set of techniques, but as a wholistic approach always in tune with the natural intelligence, in harmony with the world we are a part of.

Throughout the program we learn about the Orders of love, specially the order of precedence and the right to belong – the two systemic laws we often break with devastating consequences. We also learn about the consequences of the two most common and most devastating dynamics: “me for you” and “you for me”.

Learning how to access the information from “the knowing field” where it is stored will be the essential part of the process. You will also be learning how to rely on your perception, and how to perceive well, a skill that most of us need to learn from scratch if we want to see the phenomena as they are, without the blinkers of our judgements and beliefs.

Although many procedures will be demonstrated, students are encouraged to learn how to listen to own soul for guidance. You will venture into the uncharted territory of  the Greater Soul, where things are not always what they seem from the perspective of our everyday reality. Actually, they might be exactly opposite. So, you have to be prepared to leave all your preconceived ideas, plans, and wishes for control behind, as in constellations we are taken to another level of experience, which reveals different reality.

There is no learning Constellations if we do not have absolute trust to what we see at that level, trust the forces which are at work here, trust the method by which we get there, and also trust in our guide to these places – your facilitator. Too much scepticism obstructs the learning. Critical questioning of systemic principles is not encouraged, as the basic trust in their omnipresent wisdom is a prerequisite for learning this approach.

Learning Constellations is not only about learning a skill, but it is about setting on to a path of deep personal transformation and spiritual growth. So, this journey is long, not easy and should not be embarked on by the light hearted.  It can’t be learned as a fixed set of techniques which we can apply automatically in certain situations.

I approach Constellations as a spiritual path of knowledge, which requires time and discipline, as well as abandoning most of our old ways, as it pushes us into ever new levels of awareness. Rather than a strong mind, an open heart is called for, and willingness to rely on intuition and other forms of knowledge, we are so not used to in our Western civilization ways.

The learning of systemic constellations also brings us back to our roots, personal and collective. So, you have to be prepared to follow your ancestral lines and to rely on your “tribal brain” as you come closer to the essence of what it means to be human, the knowledge shared by our tribal/clan/cave relatives.

The constellating procedure will vary depending on the participants, the issues they bring and their experience, but it will include classical family constellations, as well as new spiritual constellations, including mediumistic constellations, and everything in between. The variety of approaches and procedures in constellation work will be demonstrated, always guided by what is presented and needed in the moment by a particular person having a question, always putting ourselves in the service of Life for the whole system.

What you learn you will be able to apply to all life situations and environments, starting with your immediate family environment,  your work and also wider community and collective levels, including bigger systems like nature.

The Constellations developed by Hellinger as taught in this programme, are adjustable and applicable in all sorts of life situations and professions, because what is in its essence is the systemic approach, which , once you are familiar with, you can apply to your particular circumstances and different fields of application.

In this program you will simultaneously follow two different tracks, which will be at all times entwined:

  1. The Systemic Laws and Principles as they apply to all different areas of our lives
  2. The Phenomenological Approach of arriving to information, insight and knowledge about all the specific and universal aspects of our lives

All the teachings are originally Hellinger’s and all the essential aspects of this work I have learnt through him. So, all programs are delivered with full acknowledgement and gratitude.  The value of Hellinger’s  insights and his life’s work is enormous, and I have been happy to devote my life’s time to learning and applying these. Even though I have more than 25 years of constellating experience, I do not offer “master classes” or specialized advanced trainings.  In  my view, there is only one Master of Constellations – Bert Hellinger (more about BH you can read here) . I humbly devote myself to spreading the teaching that I have received through him and from him, always trying to be as true to the original as possible, in my own unique way and enabling others to do the same.

Every program and every process takes us straight to the core and each constellation and every person is treated with same respect, in full reverence of the forces which drive them.  The same attitude is encouraged in the participants.

This is the spirit in which the program is offered. More about the format and specific topics you can find on the Education Program page. The teaching program can be adjusted to your group’s needs and delivered as a whole through a serious of modules, or taken as individual teaching modules / workshops with specific themes. All programs are currently offered online through a Zoom platform.


I have devoted a good part of my life to studying , learning and teaching constellations. As a Psychologist, I have first encountered constellations in 1995 as part of my Gestalt therapy studies. That was a start of my constellation journey which saw me immerse myself in this work, learning directly from Hellinger and others who were early students of his, on different continents, leading to me gradually leaving the field of psychology and psychotherapy to become a full time constellation facilitator and educator in this field. All areas of my personal and professional life have been inspired, and in-Spirited by this process. The work has changed me and my life in ways I could not even dream possible and continues to be a constant source of new insights and knowledge, as well the unending source of joy, awe, challenge, inspiration and love.  I remain in gratitude to my teacher, and also the forces which have brought me onto this, constellation path.






(a philosophy that underpins the Hellinger’s approach)


Wu Wei has also been translated as “creative quietude,” or the art of letting-be. This does not mean a dulling of the mind; rather, it is an activity undertaken to be the Tao within all things and to cultivate oneself to its “way.”

The concept of Wu Wei is often described as performing acts bereft of self, but this merely exposes the background of the writer. Other religions have selfless acts and “doing good” as part of their belief systems. In Taoist teaching, however, “good” is unknowable. An act bereft of self can only be performed by someone in an egoless state. Every act performed by someone in the usual way of things has some kind of reward attached whether it is financial, power, love, status or just feeling good about oneself. All these things are ego re-inforcing. To perform an act bereft of self one must let go of one’s ego and pass into an enlightened state of consciousness. This is called wu wei – the state of doing without doing. Here every act is without self for the ego has ceased to exist. There is no making decisions and the outcome is always perfect.

In neijia, one of the aims is to be able to fight in this state. There is no ego wishing to aggrandise itself by punishing the opponent and every move is performed effortlessly before one has time to think. One blocks every move by one’s opponents yet for all parties involved you might be playing with clouds (it’s painless and without harmful consequence).

As one diminishes doing—here ‘doing’ means those intentional actions taken to benefit us or actions taken to change the world from its natural state and evolution—one diminishes all those actions committed against the Tao, the already present natural harmony. As such one begins to cultivate Tao, one also becomes more in harmony with Tao; and, according to another great ancient Taoist philosopher Zhuangzi, attains a state of Ming, or ‘clear seeing’. It is in the state of Ming that the Taoist is in full harmony with Tao, and ‘having arrived at this pointless point of non-action, there is nothing that is left undone.’ It is upon achievement of this Chinese equivalent to ‘enlightenment’ that a sage begins to perform wei wu wei, or ‘action without action.’ Thus the sage will be able to work in harmony with Tao to accomplish what is needed, and, working in perfect harmony with the Tao, leave no trace of having done it.

An example of active non-action using wu wei, would be to teach in such a way that no course of action is dictated to a student (they are just told raw facts for use, and left to their own creative devices), so they assume that they have been taught nothing, that is, until their learnings have been integrated in their lived experience.


Tao te Ching

In the original Taoist texts, wu wei is often associated with water and its yielding nature. Although water is soft and weak, it has the capacity to erode solid stone and move mountains. Water is without will (that is, the will for a shape), though it may be understood to be opposing wood, stone, or any solid aggregated material that can be broken into pieces. Due to its nature and propensity, water may potentially fill any container, assume any shape; given the Water cycle water may potentially go “anywhere”, even into the minutest holes, both metaphorical and actual. Droplets of water, when falling as rain, gather in watersheds, flowing into and forming rivers of water, joining the proverbial sea: this is the nature of water.


Several chapters of the most important Taoist text, the Tao Te Ching, attributed to Laozi, allude to “diminishing doing” or “diminishing will” as the key aspect of the sage’s success. Taoist philosophy recognizes that the Universe already works harmoniously according to its own ways; as a person exerts their will against or upon the world they disrupt the harmony that already exists. This is not to say that a person should not exert agency and will. Rather, it is how one acts in relation to the natural processes already extant. The how, the Tao of intention and motivation, that is key.

Related translation from the Tao Tê Ching by Priya Hemenway, Chapter II:


The Sage is occupied with the unspoken

and acts without effort.

Teaching without verbosity,

producing without possessing,

creating without regard to result,

claiming nothing,

the Sage has nothing to lose.

It is a matter of agreeing to non-action, trusting, that something else will arise without my intervention.”

Bert Hellinger

More about Bert Hellinger